Thus Says Suzanne...

The Devil responds to Pat Robertson

Apparently the devil got wind of Pat Robertson's claim that he had signed a pact with the Haitians, that they are now cursed and that is why they suffered the earthquake.

Dear Pat Robertson,

I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I'm all over that action.

But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating. I may be evil incarnate, but I'm no welcher. The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished.

Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth -- glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle. Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake. Haven't you seen "Crossroads"? Or "Damn Yankees"?

If I had a thing going with Haiti, there'd be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox -- that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style. Nothing against it -- I'm just saying: Not how I roll.

You're doing great work, Pat, and I don't want to clip your wings -- just, come on, you're making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That's working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract.

Best, Satan

(LILY COYLE, MINNEAPOLIS.  Originally published in the Minneapolis Star-Tribune.)

Pat Robertson is an idiot

The earthquake in Haiti is apparently (according to this bonehead) because they made a deal with the devil.  

Oh hell to the no!

The ick factor here cannot be overstated.  

Update - The previously posted video became unavailable.  This is a fresh link and should work.

She asked for a book

Getting the youngster turned on to books has been an uphill battle.  She loves stories, and the audiobooks I buy for her and that we get at the library get a workout, but she hasn't really been all that interested in reading.  

She has two books (and audiobooks) about the secret lives of dolls and what they do when the humans aren't around.  She loves these stories all the way.  

When she has no assigned homework I have her read for 30 minutes a day.  This vacation she's been taking that seriously.

Yesterday she was reading one of the books about the doll people, and asked me if there were any more stories about them (last time I checked, there were not).  I discovered that indeed there is a new story and when I told her she begged me to get it for her.  

How could I refuse?  In fact, just so that she has time to dig in before her vacation is over I paid extra for one-day shipping.  She likes reading!  

A friend from Zweibrucken

Facebook is kind of interesting in that you never know who you may find, or who may find you.  Yesterday I got a friend request from my best friend from fourth grade.  (I should point out that I wasn't living in this country at that time, and fourth grade was a long time ago.)  

I only signed up for Facebook to begin with because my friend Lorraine wanted me to look at some images she had posted.  When I started adding friends, I specifically searched for Tracy but she hadn't signed up.  I gather she signed up shortly after I did.

I love it when technology becomes a tool to help connect people.  And, I'm glad to have connected again with a dear friend from my past.

Seven years ago

Seven years ago Laci Peterson was getting ready for a Christmas she would never live to see.  The son she was carrying would never draw breath.  I'll be thinking of them both today. 

changes

Yes, I've made some changes in the design of the blog.  I don't know how long I'll keep it looking like this...it feels strange to me.  Let me know what you think. 

I did add my twitter feed so if there are no fresh posts you might check there for new information which is where I tend to slip things when I'm in a hurry.

a little December fog

This is a grab shot from this morning.  I used to pack for safari (with camera gear) when I left the house, then I downsized to a pocket digital - which I still carry - but I shot this one with my iPhone.  

 

Awkward

Let me just preface this by saying I don't have any tattoos myself.  What's the protocol on how many tattoos of different men's names should one woman have on different parts of her body?  Let's say she has a tramp stamp on her lower back with one man's name, should she have another man's name on her neck, over her breast?  Awkward.

it's bloody hot in here

It was frosty here this morning so I added a sweater and sat down to work.  I normally keep things on the cool side during the winter (duh, it's cheaper and I'm the only one here during the day).  I got up a few minutes ago and could not get over how hot it was in here.  Checked the thermostat and it was NOT where I had set it.  Clearly the youngster is going to need a refresher course on not touching it since she had set it to 80 degrees!