Thus Says Suzanne...

a good start

We fetched the munchkin yesterday and things are off to a good start.  She and the youngster are having a great time playing together.  

Remember the Barbie house?  The munchkin likes it all the way.  

the return of the neglectful blogger, with some big news

I've been a neglectful blogger.  Mea culpa.  

We're adding someone new to the household today.  A five-year-old girl I will refer to here as the munchkin.  (That's the big news.)

In other news, it is clear to me that the school district is not ready for prime time when it comes to the youngster so she is officially being homeschooled.  I love it, love it, love it!  (So does she.)  

The youngster is pretty excited to have a sister again.

Cloud

I wish this tiny movie was shown to every prospective foster and adoptive parent.  I was moved to tears.


Cloud - Click here for funny video clips

nooooooooooooooooo

Foster/adoptive parents learn quickly which social workers are worth their weight in gold, and which ones are just dead weight (or worse).  The social worker I was lucky enough to work with as a foster parent with my local foster family agency was like Aztec gold - priceless. 

I got an e-mail from her today saying she's leaving the agency at the end of the month.  She didn't offer any details but I wouldn't be even a little surprised to learn that she is a victim of the deep, deep, deep budget cuts California has made. 

I plan to get together with her before she's gone, and hopefully we'll be able to stay in touch later.  I've been truly lucky to have her as my social worker for the last three years and I'm sick at the thought of her leaving. 

the bus driver messed with the wrong kids

Imagine for a moment that you are the adoptive parent (very recently having accomplished the adoption after three years of fostering the child) of a child with a background of profound abuse and neglect in their family of origin.  Imagine that for the last three years you have engaged in three different types of therapy with them, and helped write an IEP to place them in a special program designed to meet the needs of severely emotionally disturbed children.

Now imagine that the child gets a new bus driver.  The new driver brings your child home an hour late.  The child comes home on the first day reporting that the children asked the driver to turn down the music, but that the driver responded by turning it up.  Your child reports that suddenly there are teenagers on the bus and that one of them gets into a shouting name-calling match with a friend/classmate of your child.  When the bus driver moves the friend/classmate to the front of the bus to sit next to your child, your child lets the driver know that you have instructed your child (for very, very, very good reasons) not to sit next to boys on the bus.  The driver tells your child, "Your mother is not driving the bus and she is not the boss on the bus."  A teenaged girl takes your child's backpack and places it behind the driver.  Your child comes home very unhappy and confused.  The other children on the bus are standing up on the bus and are very agitated.

The next day your child comes home sobbing and tells you that on the ride home the bus driver told her "shut the hell up, look outside and enjoy the ride." Your child is so frightened that she says she can't ride the bus anymore.

Well, if it were my child (and it is) there would be a big dust-up involving formal letters of complaints until I was assured that this driver would never again drive my child or her friends/classmates anywhere again.

the adoption decree is here

We finalized the adoption on Monday (yippppeeeeeee!!!) and I've been waiting for the paperwork to catch up to us.  It arrived in today's mail so I can finally prove the youngster is my daughter! 

The ceremony was beautiful, and the judge permitted all three girls to be adopted into their respective families at the same time.  I spent the entire time in the courtroom wiping away tears because the moment was so huge. 

I don't have the words to express my joy.

13 days

In 13 days I will be at the local courthouse finalizing the youngster's adoption.

the real deal

Things have been crazy lately in terms of scheduling, even crazier than usual.  After signing the adoption placement papers on Monday I didn't give much thought to how it would affect our schedule.

My foster agency social worker called me earlier today to ask if I still wanted to have our weekly meeting.  I'm thinking yes, of course.  She agreed that would be fine, and then went on to tell me it would be our last one because the youngster is no longer part of the foster care system.  Wasn't expecting that.  She's been my security blanket and I will miss our Wednesday meetings.

We're losing behavioral therapy services (long story, and if I think about it right now I'll get angry all over again) on Tuesday so that drops another three appointments a week. 

I'm starting to think that after more than two and a half years of truly intense scheduling I might actually have a chance at a personal life again.

preadoptive placement

Yesterday I signed the paperwork that changes the youngster's status from foster placement to a preadoptive placement.  Around the middle of July I have another meeting with our adoptions worker and at that time she should have the finalization date. 

We're looking at a finalization date (we think) at around the end of July, first part of August. 

back to one

As of Wednesday evening I am back down to one child.  There are very, very, very good reasons for this.

On Monday morning I get the full disclosure on the youngster's life so far, and I then sign adoption placement papers.  After that there will be a post-placement visit, and my social worker from the state adoptions unit will schedule a court date with the judge to finalize the adoption.  The youngster should have her new forever last name by the time school resumes in the fall.

I will not be taking any more foster placements.  I will not try to adopt a second child.